elegentry

meeting until 7:10, home 8pm needing "food or the world will end"- I eat some weird things when needing to produce food in extremis like this, did manage to avoid nasty fast food though.  I had forgotten to take anything crafthall useful with me this morning so I had to come home and once here and fed, I would have got to crafthall 30min before needing to leave again. So I shall put the bins out and do the dishes- what exciting achievements. Well after an 11+ hour day I'm lucky to get that much done. A few stars appliqued would have been more fun and the company better but sadly not to be today. Bother

Matters have improved since Monday night. Especially since Monday night itself but lets not go there.

Slowly getting a feel for this new job. The people are really nice, welcoming  and seem devoted to their work- I like that. . There is more accountingy sort of stuff in it that I thought, not sure I am going to enjoy that. However people say one can mould a job to oneself- I shall try to move it in more practical directions or something.

Am feeling odd. Emotionally exhausted or something. I need to get my head around the new job before I can redefine some of  who I am? If I'm not the old me, then who am I? I like to think I don't define myself by what I do for a living but that seems to not be the case. Also, spending a full week at a new desk with completely new people around me was tiring. It was like my antennae had to be up all the time, could not just settle and work, partly 'cause I didn't know what I needed to do. This will all improve over time but is probably the cause of my reclusiveness today.

I was considerably relieved that our planned harvest festival was postponed at something like the last minute. Not that I don't want to go, I DO. I just didn't want to go TODAY. Instead I have spent the day alone at home being domestic. Most unusually, I could not even bring myself to seek company for tonight. Don't have the energy to converse. Didn't really want to write this post but wanted to record something of this state of mind.

It seems I am slowly doing an (Autumn ) Spring clean. In some ways it makes sense. Want to get the house nice before I spend the winter shut up in it. One does spend more time at home during winter. As I haven't cleaned or tidied properly in a LONG time, and I live in a house that is far bigger than necessary.... there is plenty to do.

Of minor note today
-finally got brave and washed the two festi gowns (and one favourite underskirt )that needed it. Won't really know how that went until I try pressing them
-cleaned and polished the 2pairs shoes worn at fest and were rather the worse for wear
-tidied the back yard some. Including disposing of the plants that didn't make it through the summer heat.
-plant the new parsley seedlings out to the herb garden. Grown from seed and had already been potted up once
-lots of boring laundry, dishes, groceries
-some jewellery assembly. Might write more on that tomorrow.

Tonight I am cooking a monster pot of curry. I am trying to empty the freezer so I can defrost it but I keep making more stuff to put in it. Maybe tomorrow I will use the esky and go ahead to do the defrost anyway. Possibly  not the best day to pick- coldest forecast in ages. But It always seems mad to reject an impulse to actually do housework. Mostly I hate it so any actual inclination to do it must be seized or live in squalour.

Oh, and isn't it nice to be at home safe with storms going on outside? I have always liked that. Hasn't been enough proper weather lately. Go the rain!

I am feeling a bit distressed, rejected etc. I got in to work today to find my replacement logged on at my desk! Actually not a bad idea but that doesn't mean I have to like it.

I now understand why there is a cliched character- usually a father figure- who comes home from work, says "Ugg" (or words to that effect) pours himself a drink and stares at the wall for a while. I even left work at 5 today and am still suffering that effect. Must prod myself into putting dinner on.

The strange path to my new job (?) continues. Both current and future boss made cryptic comments today about notes going out tomorrow so looks like I have a new job for Christmas. Don't congratulate me yet. Be sure I'll tell if it really does become official.

Sorry to be posting this just after ms_kilian  's post about hiring freeze.

Work is mad, need I say it? 7:30am to 6:45pm today. Eye strain and general exhaustion ensue. The idea of 4 days off is blissful.

busy few days with no LJ, pout. However.... the job application went in on time. I have at least 2 competitors, wish I knew who the second one is. Whatever, not the end of world if I don't get it. If numbers of well-wishers counts, I'd be a shoe in. Ta for all the good luck messages.

In other, more certain and  immediately relevant news: 
-I have freshly trimmed hair, with a surprise point no less!
-I have decided on and altered a frock
-to wear to R's annual cocktail party!!!, to which I am going!!!! If you know what and where this is and are going too- I look forward to seeing you there.
-because of this I am NOT working tomorrow!! YAY, 3 day weekend!.

I refuse to apologise for the number of exclamation marks in this post.

and I am liking this new style I am trialing for my journal. One day I might learn how to design my own. Would probably end up somewhere between this one and the previous trial. Parchmenty with a dark border and a bit of detailing and pretty fonts. Sort of elegant, readable steampunk. There are several pretend handwritten styles but I don't find them terribly usable.

My big question for today: will I be brave enough to wield an angle-grinder for the first time? Various metal things for the bathroom need editing and I haven't the strength or patience to do it with a hacksaw. Is it stupid to also cut wooden things with an angle-grinder?

First I need to finish waking up. Then I will measure and mark the cut lines carefully. Then find clamps, goggles etc. Both hands on the anglegrinder... We will see.

It is late for me to be still waking up. I went to bed early-first time for weeks. Then got a call from giddyaunt , a lovely thing, and still within the bounds of "a reasonable hour". Then work rang with a big issue in one of my ports which kept me up till past midnight. Not my fault and I can't fix it but that doesn't stop me feeling sick-guilty. Really hard to sleep in that state. I am on tenterhooks waiting for the call that says all OK now.

Big nasty week makes me feel like crying. Or curling in a ball with a pillow on my head! I haven't but I have that tight feeling around the eyes as if I might any minute.

Went to the big I store on the way home last night and bought more cupboards for the bathroom. I really like them, they will look great. Not sure how long they will last,  being made out of plastic coated chipboard. Still, they were the only thing I could find of the right shape. Proper wood would be far better but just not available without getting them custom made. Yes Papa could do that but we have better things to do with his limited time. I just settled myself a little by making up the other 'under basin' cupboard. Looks much better with one either side, balanced and symmetrical. Then to make up the tall one for next to the loo and the medicine cupboard. That will have to wait for another day. Later I have plans for a mirror over the basin, cunningly mounted on hinges and a basket or two for intermittently damp things like laundry bags and cleaning cloths. There is also of course the 'arranging things in the cupboards' task to come. I also have visions of pretty jars on a shelf but I still haven't decided where that will go.

Before I leave the house I must:
-eat lunch
-do the dishes
-prune the rosemary for hall decorations
-water the front garden?
-pack my:
outfit
feasting gear
grog
banner
banner fixing bits
wash bag.